Monday, June 27, 2011

Lack of Communication Will Destroy any Relationship!


Communication (open honesty) is one of the main reason relationships/marriages end. First and foremost, if your mate isn't your best friend, you are already in a doomed situation. You are both enemies in disguise. The person you decide to live your life with should be the one you can tell your deepest secrets and trust that he/she would never use that information against you. I know women who tell all their relationship/marital business to relatives, friends, etc. Then get advice, most of the time, from people who are not even an expert in that area. What I mean is if you are single or divorced and have not learned the secret to why it didn't work; thus learning the lesson, you are not QUALIFIED, to give advice. However, if you are sharing your experience to help someone avoid the pitfalls you've experienced, then great. It's funny, my X-husband called me to say after 11yrs. that our marriage didn't work because he didn't know how to communicate with me. He blamed himself. Although I forgave him a long time ago, I let him speak because at this point he needed to forgive himself and move on. The great thing about it is we are friends now. I'm such a divorce sport.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Are You Married 2 Your Husband & His Mama?


There is a saying that when you marry a man, you marry his mama. In some cases that is true...and you better believe that 99.9% of these marriages end in divorce, unless the man makes a conscious decision to detach from his mother. I'm not saying forget about her, no, not at all. I am saying, his mother should no longer be in the forefront of his life. She is no longer his immediate family, but now the wife is. Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. How will he become one with his wife, if he allows his mother to stand between them. Mother's do have a hard time letting go, and that's because they feel threatened that "this woman" is taken "my baby away from me"! Wake up mom's, with all due respect, he is NO LONGER your baby. Now, on the other side, the wife should respect his mother and be understanding, especially if he has a close relationship with her. If these women don't have their proper place in a man's life, divorce will surely be the end result!......Mama wins this fight! SMH!